The ‘Great Gatsbys of Golf’ finally exposed as nothing more than well-spoken prostitutes and scumbags …..
By Conor Galvin
Where it all began …. July 2017
Beneath the veneer of the charismatic All-American kid, Phil Mickelson was finally exposed as a degenerate gambler. His role model status and pearly white smile was blown to pieces in an insider trading case. Phils great friend and confidant Billy Walters had just taken Dean Foods to the cleaners and brought Mickelson to the pig trough for every feeding frenzy. The two confrères had laughed all the way to the bank. Walters made several million whilst Mickelson trousered just shy of one million profit. It was here that the smoke and mirrors finally disappeared. A disease, a sickness, a crippling addiction but when you’ve just made $900M in career earnings yet you’re still without an arse in your trousers …. it’s a pretty special case. A forced affidavit of current wealth revealed the true extent of Phils financial mayhem. Phil ran like a scalded hound for high ground as the flood waters rose around him. He was forced to play his trump card and informed the prosecution that he would invoke the 5th amendment for fear of self incrimination ie. Phils legal team decreed that he was too fragile to take the stand, the truth or perhaps his version of the truth could have landed him in jail ….
In lieu of testimony he was named him as a “relief defendant” in the civil case, meaning that the agency believed that he profited from insider trading in Dean Foods. Mickelson settled by agreeing to surrender his trading profits plus interest of more than $100,000. In doing so, he neither admitted nor denied the allegations in the SEC’s complaint. Mickelson walked whilst Bill Walters rotted in a cell. Phil returned to his career but he was no longer in his prime of golf. His pulling power was still enormous but when you’re betting big and the house always wins ….. when is enough ever really enough!? Cometh the hour, Cometh the Saudis!! Spearheaded by Greg Norman fronting the charge on his white horse of morality. The Great White Shark himself …. The ‘king of the choke’ down the home stretch in Majors finally gave us a reveal into the true degenerate we were rooting for all those years. In time honoured Aussie tradition concerned only about the wellbeing of thy fellow man ….
Mickelson locked in a drowning mans grip was always going to follow the money. But what of Graeme McDowell? He ensured that any goodwill on these shores be torpedoed forever. “G-Mac” was given plenty of leverage despite his arrogance, lack of personality and retarded accent. We still accepted him…. just …. but not anymore. His defence of his defection was downright idiotic. He described golf as “a force of good” insinuating somehow that by embracing golf the Saudis might stop slaughtering gays and non-conformists to Sharia law. McDowell’s humiliating PR machine didn’t stop there. He ventured further that he was committed to the LIV tours because of their “love for the game of golf” and reiterated that his main focus hadn’t changed “I just try and be a great role model for kids!”
Vomit.
McDowell is no better than the soccer scumbags. What separate them is the different audience. The soccer goons get free rein in the absence of critical analysis. Just look at the Saudi take over of Newcastle United — within 24 hours the whole of St. James Park had themselves togged out in Keffiyehs. They celebrated a liberation from Mike Ashley. Like the Red Army opening the gates of Auschwitz. Soccer fans are brain dead cabbages, mentally warped and beaten down by television, social media and hype. They believe because they have to believe. Try telling Liverpool fans that they are simply a subsidiary franchise of the Boston Red Sox and the Pittsburgh Penguins …. Religion prohibits such thoughts for fear the truth could destroy them. Golf fans have no such blinkered vision. The discerning and turnover of players allows them a macro view of the world. McDowells naïve rhetoric will earn him a lonely existence after the Saudis decide to toss him aside after 6 months once they realise that the world 374th ranked player isn’t really much of an attraction after all.
So nobody really gives a f**k about LIV, it’s a retirement home for washed up and out of form players. Not one single player on the roster is in the prime of their career. The tsunami has made landfall but the toothpaste is now out of the tube and everyone can see it’s blatant sportswashing. The rebels who have made the switch better make sure they get paid up front as their days are numbered. They have already disappeared as heroes in the hearts and minds of those who care about the game. Any money argument is balderdash in the extreme — five golfers already sit inside the Forbes Highest Paid Athletes of all time list. Nefarious greed has taken over. It is sickening nonetheless to see these once great role models finally exposed as nothing more than well-spoken prostitutes and scumbags.
