Snowflake Generation now a bigger threat than Global Warming ….
“I didn’t know who I was, and I was always trying to be other people. I didn’t know when I was Keith, I didn’t know when I was Hank (the name he gives to his depressive side). And thankfully I can tell the difference now.” — Keith Earls.
Ever wonder what a chicken goes through in their final moments …. The reincarnation of the holocaust for our corn fed friends! They torch, guillotine and mutilate the poor feckers before shrink wrapping them for the supermarket shelves. And here’s the kicker …. the label! …. “Organic!” …. Boom! …. now we’re eating healthy! Better again, it gives us that warm fuzzy feeling that the chicken came from a good home with loving parents. It makes the cooking process all the more humane as our formerly feathered friends sizzle at 200 degrees Celsius. The slaughter and consumption of chickens is akin to the modern day sports biography. Labelling is king. My name is Keith Earls and I’m Bi-polar, my name is Shane Carthy and somehow I made it back from the nuthouse to become a corporate dream, my name is Aidan O’Mahony and I’m just a bollix who wants to sell books! Remarkable how these lads pulled themselves back from the brink. Big business. Every cloud has a silver lining or does every silver lining need a dirty big cloud ….?
The reality is some people are just not cut out for the modern world and all it’s suffocating nonsense. Their fault or ours? Revolution or depression. Lets avoid revolution and drug the bastards instead. Sports personalities have latched onto this parasitic phenomenon. “Let them eat cake” as Marie-Antoinette would famously utter. This time around the zeitgeist is all about making the depressed even more depressed. Famed comedian ‘Rorys Stories’ is off and running on a mental health road show …. A wha!? … Exactly! The same fecker who is meant to cheer people up is telling them “it’s okay not to be okay” and sharing life experiences. Sure what chance do the rest of us have! Full steam ahead on the gravy train …. Big business!
So the world is trying to be a better place. Outrage and victimisation is everywhere. Sportspeople of colour still take the knee in solidarity with the Black Lives Matter movement. Soccer players still hold the monopoly on the knee taking. All the while their forefathers and current custodians of African states preside over everything from child trafficking to mutilation. Perhaps Twitter isn’t so bad after all. The Qatar world cup is coming up. Perhaps they should take the knee for all the poor bastards who will die building their stadia between now and when the first ball is kicked. Marcus Rashford and Co have built beautiful and seismic PR machines. Rashford is backboned by the heartbreak of being attacked on twitter but perhaps the truth is closer to home. A cursory glance across the dressing room at his great friend and Ivory Coast stalwart Eric Bailly could unveil an inconvenient truth. Hundreds of thousands of children are trafficked and enslaved across the Ivory Coast on Cocoa plantations. Who is taking the knee for them? Eric Bailly is proud to represent his homeland and wear the national badge. Nothing to see here folks. When he takes the knee and closes his eyes perhaps it’s the child slaves back home he’s actually thinking of …. perhaps ….
The COP26 accord has broken new ground which will save our future and preserve our great terrain…. not! Unfortunately, the show is over folks. The ice caps are melting at a rate which is already uncontrollable. The seas are rising and the greedy bastards who just don’t care if their grandchildren literally ‘sink or swim’ will ultimately be the death of us. It’s a sad end to a brutal and unsophisticated planet full of spoilt brats pressing their own agenda, not long left now ….
And so that brings us nicely on to our next subject. So where is tennis sensation Peng Shuai? It’s quite a curious case which will no doubt end in tragedy. Citing sexual abuse at the hands of the Chinese government is akin to hara-kiri of oneself. She must have known that such a disclosure would result in the dark abyss. It’s unlikely international attention or token zoom calls will save her now. Another case of China being above the international law paradigm. Perhaps invasion is the only answer but none of the superpowers are willing to stir the hornets’ nest. Only one thing for it — a Hollywood recreation of real life Avengers — The BLM, The LGBTQ and The Enraged Feminists could group together and form a mass cordon around the Chinese border threatening invasion if Peng Shua isn’t released by dawn. No doubt a Mexican stand off will ensue, even more time for the global flood waters to rise further. My money is on Chinese prime minister Xi Jinping to fire the first shot …..
